Marriage is a huge commitment device

Last week, we discussed the laws governing the properties of married couples in the Philippines. If you missed that, click "Of pre-nups and balance sheets".

As I write the final installment of the FQ trilogy, I am reading and re-reading a lot of materials about commitment devices. I have also discussed this subject in my past articles, podcasts and videos. (Here are some of them: Understanding our three selves for better saving and investing, Money and other life lessons from legendary Ulysses, Your Future Self with Hal Hershfield.)

A commitment device is a choice that our present-self makes, restricting the set of choices which may include some form of punishment or reward to our medium-term self, in order to control impulsive behavior for the good of our future-self. 

Marriage is a commitment device, a huge one! It is the legally recognized union of two people as partners in a personal relationship. It is a very old institution that started some 4,350 years ago. But do you know that in the beginning, if Tina Turner asked the question she popularized in her song, “What’s love got to do with it?” the answer would have been “nothing?” Yes, marriage was not about love, it was a transactional union. Its purpose was for a man to “own” a woman and to guaranty that the children were his. Thus, if the wife was unable to bear children, the husband could give her back and marry someone else. 

Later on, the Roman Catholic Church became a powerful institution and consequently, got the authority to legalize marriage. It was a positive development for women because this gave them greater respect – both parties had to be sexually faithful to one another and it forbade divorce. Marriages continued to be arranged. Then love has entered the picture in the 12th century as some historical records show. The French introduced the concept of men wooing women in order to win them for marriage.

Marriage continues to be popular today. Weddings have become such a pageantry and a huge business as so many wedding elements have been invented. 

Let’s look at the commitment device aspect of marriage.

There are always two sides of a coin. The strong legal bond has made it very difficult for